web analytics

When There Are No Words

by Twitchy on November 20, 2012

Nine weeks ago…there was a future, full of plans big and small. Plans for the twilight years. Plans for New Year’s celebrations with dear friends.

Eight weeks ago…a small pain. A doctor visit.

Seven weeks ago…news. Very bad news. The worst.

The next handful of weeks…a blur. Action, sadness, urgent gathering, disbelief, pain.

Best Mate delivers a man the paper every morning and sits with him, bringing his Old Pal cheer. He’s the only one allowed to see. Weeks ago, in grave danger, Best Mate had life-saving surgery. Concerned, Old Pal came to his hospital bedside daily, to crack jokes and ensure his Best Mate rallied.
Best Mate fully recovered. Now this.

“I wonder who’ll be at my funeral?” asks bedridden Old Pal.
“I’ll take a rollcall and pop a note in your box, shall I?” answers Best Mate.
The sore man still manages a laugh. “You old bastard.”

One week ago…devastation. Mirrors covered. Ceremonies. Best Mate’s speech.

Last weekend…the house was bursting with all the people. Respects paid.

Last night…I stood in a kitchen with a woman who keeps her hands busy. Precious happy faces smile down at us from the fridge and walls. We spoke about trees. She loves trees. Her garden is full of the things he planted, the world full of things he did for others. He is everywhere, but nowhere.

Today…the house is quiet. Too quiet. She is alone, and the bed’s too big.

There will be no Happy New Year.

Stricken, she still doesn’t know how to cry.

For W.

{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

Amy November 24, 2012 at 9:29 am

Such beautiful words “He is everywhere but nowhere” x


Twitchy November 24, 2012 at 10:34 pm

Thank you Amy. This post is one I’m particularly satisfied with. I think it does justice.

Carli November 22, 2012 at 2:36 pm

Oh I’m so sad to read this. Beautiful words Twitchy x


Twitchy November 22, 2012 at 3:36 pm

Thank you Carli x

Nathalie Brown November 22, 2012 at 11:06 am

Darling how very sad, I can so relate to the ‘she still doesn’t know how to cry’. I’ve only started my crying for my mum recently. She will cry sometimes it takes time. Be there for her you are a wonderful tonic xxx


Twitchy November 22, 2012 at 3:35 pm

Aw, honey xxxx Hugs and always, love.

Marita November 21, 2012 at 12:48 pm


Powerful words


Twitchy November 22, 2012 at 12:38 am

Thank you. I was hoping I would do this justice. Xx

Kirsty Rice November 21, 2012 at 12:46 pm

Beautifully written, life can change so quickly.


Twitchy November 22, 2012 at 12:36 am

Thank you Kirsty, indeed a compliment from someone whose words I often enjoy.

Carly Findlay November 21, 2012 at 12:21 pm

Twitchy this is an amazing piece of writing. So powerful. I am sorry for your friend and her partner. Very sad.


Twitchy November 21, 2012 at 12:25 pm

Your thoughts are deeply appreciated Carly. I was meant to finish this yesterday, but my head just hurt. xx

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post: