Challenge Accepted, Walking the Walk

Wisdom: The things in life you regret most are the ones you never did. A truth that resonates with me enormously.

Confession: I was born a creative, musical type but also an anxious one, conundrum. I love participating; hate the idea of being watched. I love nothing better than live music shows but crowds make me so edgy, I sit out.

Difficulty factor: I’ve skillfully handed this genetic baton directly to my otherwise triple-threat, seven-year old daughter. Our home-brand see-saw of counter energies is a major problem for her.

Hard enough is watching your child struggle; harder again knowing from where the difficulty has come.

At Saturday dance class again she froze. Pairs of happy parental eyes looked on from beyond the glass. Stiff as a statue, she wouldn’t join. “My tummy has the bad butterflies, Mummy…” She clung with dread. I hugged her, whispered in her ear, “Dance them away, Bub. Dance them away.” Eventually she did, challenge accepted. Other times we’ve had to go home but thankfully not that day.

Saturday night, we attended a fundraiser. I was honoured to receive a second invitation for that evening, one that excited and challenged my every nerve, yet I reserved the right to decide flight or flight until the last moment.

Vintage 60s Purple Velvet makes everything better, surely.

I love this dress and sharing vintage dresses generally but I hate selfies. I don’t mind at all when other people do it but I never feel comfortable. Challenge accepted. Plus, bathroom breathing diversion. Outside, the hall was bigger and throbbed with many more attendees than I’d imagined.

Silver and black cushions for the new modular lounge. Olga Berg ‘Mocha’ clutch for me.

Next, the auction results. I was lucky enough to win both the items I bid on. A sign of things going well tonight?

Rebecca Barnard and Billy Miller did their highly infectious old-school thing and as the band rocked hard, the crowd cut loose and danced.  I envied their carefree lightheartedness (how dare they). My knot tightened, I trembled on the inside. The bad butterflies rose within me and I was angry with them but I remembered my girl. I need to walk the walk. I can’t expect her to do something I won’t.

The last three songs. My name is called…challenge accepted. I skipped up those stairs and shape-shifted into band member, no rehearsal. We harmonised, we twisted, we rocked out so seamlessly no one would have known a thing about my doubts.

I headed home proud of myself, of my example to my daughter and ecstatic I did not go home regretful. I’d cast aside thoughts of what others might think. I did not flee from happiness.

Sweetest icing on my cake? I made a friend who wants me back for the whole gig next year. Thank you Rebecca (and Billy) for letting me play; to my Twitchette for making me accountable; and thank you Purple Velvet, for your magical boost of confidence.